


Bury the Past

by SanityIsSubjective



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2016-12-16
Packaged: 2018-09-08 21:52:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8864080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SanityIsSubjective/pseuds/SanityIsSubjective
Summary: It hadn't been easy, making the choice to bury Nate. Nora tries to let go and come to terms with her new world.





	

It was strange, how the weather can change in a 200 year time span. Before the bombs, a mid-October evening would be cool and breezy, a small glimpse of the coming winter. Now that same breeze merely shifted the stagnant air, a reminder of what had passed. Nora sat on the ground, barely registering the wind. A year ago the air would have caused her to cough, the radiation thick and overbearing. Now she sat, her eyes vacant as she stared at the tombstone.

It hadn't been easy, making the choice to bury Nate.

 

_She stared as they moved his body down the hill, the sheet hiding his body but doing nothing to put her at peace. She felt a hand take her own, her fingers twitching in the grasp._

 

She hadn't even asked for their help, Preston and MacCready going into the vault without hesitation. She stood to the side as Sturges and Danse dug the grave, willing herself to not let the tears fall.

 

_"Are you sure about this Blue?"_

 

Her feet had long since fallen asleep, legs crossed for what must have been hours now. She continued to stare, back hunched and arms resting limply on her legs.

 

_"No," she replied, the word rasping as though she hadn't spoken since she woke up from the vault. "But I need this."_

 

A deep breath. In and out. A mantra she repeated for close to a year now.

"Hey Nate."

The wind blew again, and the large stone in front of her cast a longer shadow.

"Nate... I don't know what to say. There's a million things to tell you. And..." she blinked, feeling tears prickle the edges of her eyes.

"I'm sorry. God Nate, I'm so sorry. For the vault, for loosing you, for... for not finding Shawn."

She sniffed, willing herself to continue.

"I know he's out there. He's been out there for ten years but... but I haven't found him. I'm trying, God Nate I'm trying but," she drifted off again.

"I'm so goddamn sorry," she sobbed.

"I should have been better. I should have loved you like you deserved. You were my best friend, the father of my child and I... I wasn't what you deserved..."

Nora sat in silence, willing some sign from the cold dirt at her feet.

"I swear Nate, I will find him. I'll find our baby boy and I'll let him know how great a man his father was. I'll never forget you Nate.

"But I have to let you go."

Nora looked down, ashamed at her confession.

"There's someone, someone I really care about. A lot. And I don't know if I should, if I should care about someone when I have so much that I've-that I've lost and," her back shook as the sobs wrenched from within her.

She scrubbed her hands across her face, wiping away the tears.

"I loved you Nate, but not like this. Is this right? After everything, can I just... move on?"

 

_The hand in hers squeezes, warm and reassuring. "You don't have to do this Blue."_

_And she knows it, knows she could just leave him there, frozen in time and her past._

But _, a part of her thinks,_ I don't want to. I need to put him to rest. For him. And for me.

 

She looks down at her ring, a memory playing out before her.

"I remember... when you first deployed. You told me that if something happened to you, that you wanted me to live. Is this the same thing? Is it living when the world has died?"

The wind picked up again, strong enough to push her hair into her eyes. She brushed them away, only for the breeze to blow them back again.

"...Is this your way of telling me yes?"

 

_The hand held hers while they lowered him into the small grave. Located in their old backyard, a small grey tombstone rested at the head, the words "Nate Williams" carved in a crooked hand. Her eyes never left his form, barely registering the looks of confirmation thrown her way. She needed this, she needed to let him rest._

_As the first shovelful of dirt landed on him, she jumped, squeezing the hand._

_The hand squeezed back._

 

"I... I think I love her Nate."

Nora chuckled, realizing that this wasn't the first time that word had popped up when thinking of the woman.

"God Nate, you'd have loved her. Hell, if we hadn't been married you probably would have thrown me at her."

 

_The last of the dirt placed atop the grave, the men left with shovels in hand. Nora stayed in place, staring at the small mound._

_"Do you... need a moment? Alone?"_

_Nora didn't think she would ever want to be alone again, not after waking up in that nightmare. But she nodded and felt the hand in hers quickly squeeze as the other fell on her shoulder._

_"Okay."_

 

"I'm going to find Shawn, but I think that... maybe I could be happy? This world is so different, so strange but-" she sighed. "But with her, I can't even tell. With her, there is no pre-War, no Commonwealth or radiation or... or anything other than... than home.

"If this is wrong Nate, then please forgive me. But I think I want to look forward now. I want... I want to live."

Nora looked at the tombstone, waiting for any response. A small part of her expected a lightning bolt to strike her down. Instead she felt a breeze, cool and crisp and reminiscent of a time before Raiders and the Institute and the Brotherhood. A time with Nate alive and next to her.

"Okay then."

She stood, joints creaking and popping with the effort. She looked towards the stone, before gently walking around the mound. She took off her ring, setting it atop the stone before standing back.

"Thank you Nate. And... goodbye."


End file.
